I haven’t said anything relevant in this place for a very, very long time.

There was a time in my life, that this little tucked away corner of the tripledubdot was all that there was that was keeping me sane, and it is strangely refreshing to not have to rely on this place as a crutch any more.

Having said that though, it does often feel like a very large part of my life is missing, especially since I migrated this thing to wordpress.  It was just a little more fun when this whole thing was held together by with duct tape manufactured out of a couple of bash and perl scripts.

It used to feel, that whenever I had anything to say here, it was going to be oddly profound, even if only in a nerdy way that very few people understood.  Now, I don’t have much to say simply because there is not all that much going on in my life.  It seems like all I do lately is work.  I’ve had a single day off in the last 3 weeks, and it is really starting to get to me.  When I get home from work now, there is so much work to do at the house that I just tend to feel over whelmed by it, and I turn into this apathy soaked wreck who isn’t able to accomplish anything of note.  My will to move forward has really vanished in the last 8 months or so, and I’m stuck in neutral, not actually accomplishing anything of note.

The solution, is pretty simple, I think.  I think that I need a project.  Something that I can hack away at in my spare time, something that will not take up a lot of my time, but something that I can allow myself to become completely engrossed in for an hour at a time or so.  Something that is not related to my facebook, or slashdot accounts.  Something that is mine, and mine alone, that no one else can fuck with.  Something that I can see the results of my hard work.

It has to be something that caters to my talents and desires though.  Something that involves grunt labour isn’t going to cut it.  Something that leaves me feeling more tired than wired, won’t work either.  I need something that will tickle my brain and give me problems to solve, I need something that I can improve.  Something to fix.

Or, I just need 10 days sitting on a beach swilling rum straight from the bottle.

You decide.

Filed under: Dan, Insomnia, Life by dan